Now that the weather is finally cooling down, we’re all looking forward to spending more time outdoors. Whether you like it or not, fall also brings with it a regular influx of squirrels in our yards and gardens.
Whether they’re running up trees, burying nuts, or chasing each other around, these little guys are pretty entertaining to watch.
But what if you could make them even more interesting? Well…you can by cracking some squirrel-themed puns! Puns are excellent wordplay that are perfect for any occasion.
They’re also very handy when you want to make fun of someone or something without hurting their feelings or coming off as insulting. So crack open this list of the best squirrel puns and see if there’s one that tickles your fancy!
Best Squirrel Puns
1. I just got thrown out of my local park for arranging the squirrels by height. They didn’t like my critter sizing.
2. Today, I saw a squirrel poop for the first time in my life. That shit was nuts!.
3. Do you know A doctor for obese squirrels is called a nutritionist.
4. Have you heard about the new squirrel diet? It’s just nuts.
5. I was short on food, so I just followed a squirrel so I could steal his nuts. It was plenty of work for two small pieces of meat.
6. A wise squirrel once said “you are what you eat”. Don’t believe him, he was a nut.
7. If squirrels could tell jokes, they’d be quick and to the point Because they’d be in a nut shell.
8. I wanted to catch a squirrel but I didn’t know how. So I decided to climb a tree and act like a nut.
9. Some lady called the cops on me because I was giving a squirrel a nut in the park. Good thing I got my pants back on before they arrived.
10. One day I saw a squirrel burying lotto tickets under a large bush, so I asked him what he was doing. He told me he was hedging his bets.
11. I was trying to think up some squirrel puns. But, they were all too nutty.
12. Did you hear about the squirrels who watch Nutflix when they are bored?.
Great Squirrel jokes
1. Where do squirrels go when they have a nervous breakdown? – To the nut-house.
2. Where do Squirrels go during Hurricanes? – It depends on which direction the wind is blowing.
3. What do you call a space-traveling squirrel? – An astronut.
4. What does a squirrel wear on its feet? – Cashews.
5. Why don’t squirrels wear skinny jeans? – Because their nuts won’t fit.
6. Why don’t squirrels swim in cold water? – The nuts shrink.
7. What do you call a squirrel with no nuts? – A female squirrel.
8. Why did the police arrest the squirrels in the park? – For busting a nut in public view.
9. Why don’t squirrels have any friends? – Because they drive everyone nuts.
10. Why did the squirrel take apart the classic car? – To get down to the nuts and bolts.
11. How do you get a squirrel to like you? – You act like a nut.
12. How do you make friends with a squirrel? – Climb up a tree and act like a nut!.
13. What is the squirrel internet called? – The nutwork!.
14. What is squirrels’s least favourite month? – November.
If you like this collection of squirrel puns or want to share some use the comments section below we will love to hear from you.