Funny Monkey Puns To Make You Laugh Hard

This collection of Monkey puns is udderly amazing! This is one of the best places online for puns about monkey – and they are clean and safe for all ages. Great for adult and kids We’re adding funny  monkey puns all the time, so check back for new additions.

Monkey puns

Q: What did the monkey say when he cut off his tail?
A: It won’t be long now.

Q: Where should a monkey go when he loses his tail?
A: To a retailer

Q: Why did the giant ape climb up the side of the skyscraper?
A: The elevator was broken.

Q: What do you call a monkey that sells potato chips?
A: A chipmunk

Q: What do you call an angry monkey?
A: Furious George

Q: What do you tell a bad monkey?
A: Stop chimping about.

Q: Where do chimps get their gossip?
A: On the ape vine

Q: Where do chimps get their gossip?
A: On the ape vine

Q: Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree?
A: She was stapled to the first one.

Q: What do you call a Monkey in a tree?
A: A Branch Manager

Q: What does a logger say before he cuts down a tree?
A: Let the chimps fall where they may.

Q: What fruit do monkeys like to eat?
A: Ape-les

Q: If twenty monkeys run after one banana, what time is it?
A: Twenty after one

Q: How do monkeys make toast?
A: Put bread under the gorilla. (the grill)

Q: Where do monkeys go to drink?
A: The monkey bars

Q: What do you call a monkey with a banana in each ear?
A: Anything you want, it can’t hear

Q: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree?
A: Peer Pressure

Q: How do monkeys get down the stairs? A: They slide down the banana-ster.

Q: How do you open an ape?
A: With a mon-key

Q: Did you hear about the man who can jump from tree to tree?
A: He was a monkey’s uncle.

Q: What do you call a monkey with a banana in each ear?
A: Anything you want, it can’t hear you.

Q: Why did the monkey put a net over his head?
A: Because he wanted to catch his

Q: What do you get when you cross a gorilla and a parrot?
A: Polly wants a cracker NOW!!!

Q: What do you call a Chimpanzee that works in a bar?
A: A Monkey Wench

Q: Why did the monkey go to the park?
A: To climb the monkey bars

Q: What did the ape say when it missed the phone call?
A: Who-rang-utang

Q: Why do gorillas have such big nostrils? A: Because they have such big fingers

Q: Why did the monkey like the banana? A: Because it had appeal

Q: Why does the monkey go crazy?
A: Because he’s bananas

Q: How did the gorilla know he was sick? A: He had a belly ape.

Q: Why shouldn’t you get into a fight with a monkey?
A: They use gorilla warfare.

Q: How do you get an escaped lion back into his habitat?
A: With a bargaining chimp

Q: What do you call a monkey with a wizard’s hat and wand?
A: Hairy potter

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?
A: Because he was dead

Q: Why did the ape try to cook on his head?
A: He thought he was a griller.

Q: Why don’t monkeys play cards in the jungle?
A: There are too many cheetahs there.

Q: What kind of monkey flies?
A: Hot air baboons

Q: If you were in a jungle by yourself and a gorilla charged you, what would you do? A: Pay him.

Q: What do you call a baby monkey?
A: A Chimp off the old block

Q: What did the banana do when he saw a monkey?
A: The banana split

Q: Did you hear about the awful jungle party?
A: Somebody forgot to bring the chimps and dip.

Q: What do you call a Monkey in a garden?
A: A Plant Manger

Q: What do monkeys sing around Christmas time?
A: Jungle Bells

Q: How do you catch a monkey?
A: Climb a tree and act like a banana.

Q: Why did the chimpanzee cross the road?
A: Because he had to take care of some monkey business

Q: What do you call a restaurant that throws food in your face?
A: A Monkey Business

Q: What’s black and dangerous and lives in a tree?
A: A monkey with a machine gun

Q: Where does a 2,000-pound gorilla sit? A: Anywhere it wants

Q: A baboon, a monkey, and a chicken were under an umbrella. Which one got wet?
A: None of them, it wasn’t raining.

Q: Why do monkeys climb trees?
A: The elevators are always broken.

Q: What do you call a monkey that succeeds at every sport?
A: A chimpion

Q: Where does a baby ape sleep?
A: In an apricot

Q: What do you call a monkey in a minefield?
A: Baboom

Q: What side of a monkey has more hair? A: The outside

Q: When is the best time to see gorillas in the wild?
A: In Ape-ril (April)

Q: What did the monkey wear when cooking dinner?
A: An APE-ron

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