Are you looking for the most funny and hilarious elephant puns online? Do you want to dominate pun battles and be the funniest person around? These puns will make you giggle for hours with some of the funniest elephant puns in the world.
Elephant Puns
Q: Why do elephants wear sandals?
A: So that they don’t sink in the sand.
Q: Why do ostriches stick their head in the ground?
A: They’re looking for the elephants that forgot to wear their sandals.
Q: What did the peanut say to the elephant?
A: Nothing. Peanuts can’t talk.
Q: How can you tell the difference between a grape and an elephant?
A: Grapes are purple.
Q: What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?
A: Nothing. It just let out a little whine.
Q: How can you tell the difference between a grape and an elephant if you’re color blind?
A: Dance on it for a while. If you don’t get any wine, it’s an elephant.
Q: What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of giraffes in the distance?
A: “Haha! You fooled me once with those disguises, but not this time!”
Q: What is the difference between an elephant and a plum?
A: An elephant is grey.
Q: What does Jane say when she sees a herd of elephants in the distance?
A: “Look! A herd of plums in the distance!” (Jane is color blind)
Q: How did the cheerleader die?
A: She tried to catch an elephant doing a split.
Q: What time is it when you find an elephant in your car?
A: Time to get a new car
Q: What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch?
A: Time to get a new watch
Q: What time is it when an elephant sits on the fence?
A: Time to fix the fence
Q: What time is it when 10 elephants are chasing you?
A: Ten to one
Q: How do you know if there’s an elephant under your bed?
A: Your head hits the ceiling.
Q: How do you know if there is an elephant in your refrigerator?
A: The door won’t shut.
Q: How do you stop an elephant from charging?
A: Take away her credit card.
Q: What is gray and blue and very big?
A: An elephant holding its breath
Q: What does a doctor give to an elephant who’s going to be sick?
A: Plenty of room
Q: What do you do with a green elephant? A: Wait till it ripens
Q: How do you get down off an elephant? A: You don’t, you get down off a duck
Q: What do you do when you see an elephant with a basketball?
A: You get out of the way.
Q: What’s the best thing to do if an elephant sneezes?
A: Get out of its way.
Q: How do you raise a baby elephant?
A: With a fork lift
Q: Why are elephants so wrinkled?
A: They take too long to iron.
Q: Why did the elephant wear green sneakers?
A: The red ones were in the wash.
Q: Why are elephants so wrinkled?
A: Because they can’t iron themselves
Q: What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter?
A: An irrelephant
Q: What’s big and grey and wears a mask?
A: The elephantom of the opera
Q: What do elephants and trees have in common?
A: They both have big trunks.
Q: Why were the elephants thrown out of the swimming pool?
A: Because they couldn’t hold their trunks up
Q: Why wasn’t the elephant allowed on the airplane?
A: Because his trunk wouldn’t fit under the seat
Q: Why don’t you see elephants playing hide and seek?
A: Because they’re REALLY good at it
Q: What do you get when you cross a potato with an elephant?
A: Mashed potatoes
Q: What grey, has a wand, huge wings and gives money to elephants?
A: The tusk fairy
Q: What has 3 tails, 4 trunks and 6 feet? A: An elephant with spare parts
Q: What do you get if you cross an elephant with a kangaroo?
A: Big holes all over Australia
Q: What do you get when you cross a Elephant with a garden?
A: Squash
Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a dairy cow?
A: Peanut butter
Q: What do you call a elephant that never washes?
A: A smellyphant
Q: What is an elephant that flies?
A: A propellaphant
Q: What do you call the rabbit up the elephant’s sweater?
A: Terrified
Q: What do you call someone with an elephant on their head?
A: Squashed
Q: What do you call an elephant that lies across the middle of a tennis court?
A: Annette!
Q: What do you call an elephant creeping through the jungle in the middle of the night?
A: Russell!
Q: What do you call an elephant with a rabbit up its sweater?
A: Warren!
Q: What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants in the distance?
A: “Look, a herd of elephants in the distance!”
Q: What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants with sunglasses
A: Nothing. He doesn’t recognize them.
Q: Why did the elephant fall out of the tree?
A: She slipped.
Q: Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree?
A: He was glued to the first one.
Q: Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree?
A: He thought it was a game.
Q: Why did the fourth elephant fall out of the tree?
A: Because when his mother asked “If all your friends jumped out of a tree, would you?”, he said “Yes!”
Q: Why did the tree fall down?
A: It thought it was an elephant.
Q: How can you tell if there’s an elephant in the ice cream shop?
A: His bike is outside.
Q: How can you tell if there are two elephants in the ice cream shop?
A: There’s a dent in the cross-bar.
Q: How can you tell if there are three elephants in the ice cream shop?
A: Stand on the bike and have a look in the window.
Q: What should you do to a green elephant?
A: Wait until it gets ripe.
Q: What should you do to a red elephant? A: Quit telling it dirty jokes
Q: What should you do to a yellow elephant?
A: Teach it to be brave.
Q: What should you do to a white elephant?
A: Hold its nose until it turns blue, then follow the directions for a blue elephant.
Q: What do you get if you cross an elephant with a whale?
A: A submarine with a built-in snorkel
Q: What do you get if you take an elephant into the city?
A: Free parking
Q: What do you get if you take an elephant into work?
A: Sole use of the elevator
Q: What pill would you give to an elephant that can’t sleep?
A: Trunkquilizers
Q: What kind of elephants live in Antartica?
A: Cold ones
Q: What did the hotel manager say to the elephant that couldn’t pay his bill?
A: “Pack your trunk and clear out!”
Q: What do you call an elephant that can’t do sums?
A: Dumbo
Q: What animals were last to leave the ark?
A: Elephants. They had to pack their trunks.
Q: What is stronger an elephant or a snail?
A: A snail, because it carries its house, an elephant just carries its trunk.
Q: What’s grey and goes round and round?
A: An elephant in a washing machine
Q: What’s big, grey and flies straight up? A: An elecopter
Q: What’s grey and wrinkly and jumps every twenty seconds?
A: An elephant with hiccups
Q: What’s grey but turns red?
A: An embarrassed elephant
Q: What is the biggest ant in the world?
A: An elephant
Q: How do elephants talk to each other long distance?
A: On the elephone
Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant and a fish?
A: Swimming trunks
Q: What’s an elephant’s favorite vegetable?
A: Squash
Q: What’s big and grey and protects you from the rain?
A: An umbrellaphant
Q: What wears glass slippers and weighs over 4,000 pounds?
A: Cinderellephant
Q: What do you do when you find a blue elephant?
A: Cheer her up
Q: What do you call an elephant at the North Pole?
A: Lost
Q: What do you call an elephant that flies? A: A jumbo jet
Q: Why does elephant wears sneakers?
A: So that he can sneak up on mice
Q: What did the elephant say when the man grabbed him by the tail?
A: This is the end of me!
Q: Why do the elephants have short tails? A: Because they can’t remember long stories
